why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
