It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
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He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
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'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I am mentally ready for anal.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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