thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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