3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Porn is love you can see.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
