Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize