Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i think i have two assholes
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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