He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
