so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
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