I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize