So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize