my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
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