Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
