and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
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