I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...