Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
