You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
