Why are handjobs necessary in class?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
