was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Did I show you my penis last night?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
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