I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
