Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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