bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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