her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize