i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
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