You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I hate all girls vehemently.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
