Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
