She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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