I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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