I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Randomize
