Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?

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(313): I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can? http://tfl.nu/psgn

Replies (3) Good night (1133) Bad night (539)
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(540): View more from Virginia

she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love

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(540): she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love http://tfl.nu/im7c

Replies (9) Good night (1559) Bad night (575)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.

(918): View more from Oklahoma

He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."

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(918): Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now. (918): He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced." http://tfl.nu/be28

Replies (15) Good night (2368) Bad night (896)
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(641): View more from Iowa

since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.

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(641): since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing. http://tfl.nu/ihpp

Replies (10) Good night (6830) Bad night (1792)
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(325): View more from Texas

suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea

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(325): suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea http://tfl.nu/q0e7

Replies (21) Good night (1038) Bad night (4737)
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(650): View more from California

We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.

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(650): We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag. http://tfl.nu/1x8m

Replies (19) Good night (1467) Bad night (5315)
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(931): View more from Tennessee

is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?

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(931): is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl? http://tfl.nu/m6rn

Replies (20) Good night (1302) Bad night (6178)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.

(+44): View more from United Kingdom

before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN

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(+44): just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown. (+44): before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN http://tfl.nu/72q0

Replies (28) Good night (8740) Bad night (1453)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.

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(+44): I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life. http://tfl.nu/bbi7

Replies (14) Good night (7229) Bad night (1145)
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(248): View more from Michigan

You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.

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(248): You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual. http://tfl.nu/weeh

Replies (4) Good night (2608) Bad night (816)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce

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(570): I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce http://tfl.nu/7uec

Replies (2) Good night (976) Bad night (611)
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(706): View more from Georgia

It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.

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(706): It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later. http://tfl.nu/oph9

Replies (0) Good night (826) Bad night (920)
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(418): View more from Quebec

You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.

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(418): You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar. http://tfl.nu/ds06

Replies (2) Good night (814) Bad night (434)
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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...

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(262): I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf... http://tfl.nu/zbk2

Replies (4) Good night (509) Bad night (1526)
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(515): View more from Iowa

Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.

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(515): Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted. http://tfl.nu/i4ke

Replies (1) Good night (570) Bad night (259)

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