physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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