I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
it's like iHOP with fire
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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