doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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