we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
i've created a new STD.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize