Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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