dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize