I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize