At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
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does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
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