if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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