No stitches, just platelets and will power
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Just high enough for therapy.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
