my mouth tastes like poor choices
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?