she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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