She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
