what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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