So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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