Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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