I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
