Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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