I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
