you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize