All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
